My One Time Being Fooled

Her name was Eve. We were chatting online and she seemed so normal; about my age, very easy-going and ready to enjoy a night out.

I arrive at a more than expensive place and see what I thought was this girl's mother. No, it was her. I sat down and told the waiter to wait. I asked her why she didn't tell me how old she was. Eve started getting nervous. She said, "I just flirt with men so they will take me out to dinner. Besides, I have a two-for-one coupon."

I don't enjoy getting scammed. That ended with me getting up and leaving. I did meet another girl under similar circumstances who admitted she lied about her weight. She was over 300 pounds and nasty looking. I told her I wasn't happy, but she was so funny, I agreed to have lunch with her and it was a memorable experience. Still, it's just so much better when they tell the truth up front.

Nice Guys Win in the End

I've seen lots of online discussion about the "nice guy" problem. While it's true that there are some guys who are so painfully nice that they cannot even get dates, there are a lot of decent guys who treat women with respect, who never meet women interested in a relationship, or even just a few days of sex.

These are the guys who work hard and try to do the right thing. They are always upstaged by the slick players and "life of the party" types. Women talk about these SFL (save for later) guys as if they are so cute in their cluelessness. These guys rarely have a chance with the really hot girls. Most of the time, the hot girls are humping away on the players, getting used and hurt, getting a sexually transmitted disease and basically being shit on by the players and liars.

The discussion about this always ends with a pep talk to the "nice guys". The women who are still fucking their way through the players and married cheaters tell the nice guys not to give up hope, that someday, something will happen for them and some girl will really like them.

The basic message is for you decent guys to "hang in there" so after she has sexually serviced all the guys who don't deserve her, you can take care of her and pay her bills, but don't expect much in the way of love or sex, she gave all the best of herself to guys who couldn't care less about her. Don't ever commit to a woman like this. I've dated these types, even lived with them, but when they press for commitment, I leave. They don't deserve someone who will be good to them if they've spent a lifetime getting hurt and betrayed.

It's not a matter of them making bad choices, they choose what they really want. They don't want you if you are a nice guy, they want the scumbags, so treat them that way. Have sex with them, then disappear after a few weeks. If you stick around and be kind to them, they won't know how to handle it.

Nice guys don't win in the end. They are the ones left over after the women have made many years of the worst possible choices. You are only there to help soothe her emotions - and heal her broken heart. You get almost nothing in return. She's given her best years to others, and her heart still beats for some guy who cheated on her or beat her up. That's the reality, nice guy, get used to it.

I've Decided to Do It

I'm moving in with a girlfriend simply because she is wealthy. I don't really love her, but I do enjoy her company. She's wealthy beyond belief and I think it might be a good idea to land there for a while until I get my income back up over six figures.

Most of the time I wouldn't recommend doing this, as a lot of women become very controlling and possessive and want to dictate what you do every day. It can become a major hassle and there are not a lot of people who will respect you. The sex? I don't know, it can seem like a chore, but everything else is good. I wonder if I should complete my novel?

It is based on my years of being a con-artist, and I am very prolific writer if not a very good one. It could be interesting...

Anyway, just random posts for a while. Have to pay some bills. Keep the faith.

The Texter... And Other News

I have an old hookup that won't take me off her text messenger list. For some reason, my Yahoo messenger won't allow me to block her out, so I guess I'm stuck with her daily texts for now. She keeps sending me messages about how she never had an orgasm until me, which I don't believe, just thinking she wants to get together again.

In other news, the texter was irritating me until another text popped in from Emma, a great hookup from a few months ago. She was hurt that I didn't call her back and has been waiting for me to call. So, I called, and we are booked for dinner tonight.

I really like her, but I think I'm getting into a situation where she wants to be with me in a relationship, but I'm just not doing that now. Too many people are still just doing the hookup thing for me to take any woman seriously.

Oh well, that's it for now. Have a good weekend.

Yes, OK, I Recommend Condoms

Most of my six readers give me a hard time about my crazy single life. I admit I'm just having fun with women, and the majority of them know I'm not serious about ever wanting a relationship. I'm not being serious at all. Still, I have to recommend using protection. I've never had an STD and I'm not about to expose myself to one. Use condoms and try to get to understand how trashy or how clean your partners are. Most people are nasty, so be careful.

I only had one scare with no-condom sex. I was with this Jewish girl and woke up the next day with a big knot right next to my dick. I was so angry. I thought she had given me herpes. It was a small town and I told everyone I knew that XXXXX had given me herpes. Well, she hadn't. The doctor looked at it and told me it was a spider bite. I'd never been so relieved in my life.

Close call, I know... Wear condoms, it can save you a lot of headaches.

The Wrong Kind of Girl

Hailey is the kind of girl you wish there were millions of when you are young. I met Hailey on an online service - you know the kind where you are too lazy to get out and meet people so you go online.. Yep, that's what I did.

Anyway, so I meet Hailey for a late date after dinner and we just split a bottle of wine and talk. She's short and stocky but with great tits and a perfectly formed butt. We must have had two glasses of wine when we start kissing. We are watching Death Sentence with Kevin Bacon, and I'm into the movie...but, but, okay - so we go back to the bedroom and all her clothes are off very quickly. I think to put on a condom, she was trashy and we had the best sex I can remember. She was so into it, and got off just watching me get off underneath her. Her legs were so short she had to sort of squat over me and spin on top of me. It was almost too intense - like the kind of sex you have when you have a headache afterwards.

She's texted me about five times today so I think I'll see her again this weekend. It was fun, but I think I need to back away from this one pretty quickly...or maybe not.

Nice Guys Beware!!

I've learned in the dating world that if you are a nice guy type; meaning not a cheater, player or liar, then you have your own set of problems. My dating plan is just to have fun. I've been in a traditional marriage and didn't cheat. I was honest and cooperative and realized I married someone who only cared about money and being able to stop working immediately.

If you treat women with respect and be honest with them, they will very often "play" you. They will let rotten guys get away with everything. They will forgive the cheating, the emotional abuse, even physical abuse. But as a "nice guy" you can't slip up one time. If you have to suddenly cancel a date for business reasons, she will be furious, but she will forgive the jerk for cheating. If you wear the wrong suit to her sister's wedding, she will hate you, but she'll forgive the jerk for giving her a black eye.

Remember also that she had sex with Mr. Jackass on the second date, and you had to do the stupid courtship thing for week after week.

Don't let her do this to you. If you aren't having sex by the 3rd or 4th date, dump her. If she uses emotion to manipulate you, and you find yourself going to parties you hate, or not able to work as much because of her demands on your time, you might want to move on to a new woman, or even take a break for a while.

Of course, if you act like a player, and behave in a way that seems like you just don't care, she will respect you a whole lot more. Just be careful. If she has learned to be in relationships with assholes, she plays hardball. Nice guys get fucked over when battle-hardened women are involved.

They Are More Wild Than You Are

The one thing I've learned in my dating life is that women sleep around as much as men do. In my single years, I've always gotten into bed very early with women who had just gotten out of a relationship with another guy. It's always the same, we go on three dates, then I tell them I like them as a friend, but clearly we aren't ever going to have sex. On the very next date, we are in bed together. Usually, I find out later that two weeks before we met, they were screwing someone else. Of course they won't tell you this...

Anyway, you'll learn that lots of women after a certain age are dying to have sex as often as possible, even with guys that they would never have dreamed of dating when they were younger. This is why I'm not serious about any woman I date. They are so beat up emotionally and mentally, that it's best just to have sex, have fun, and then when things start to turn into a relationship, it's time break things off.

It's sad, but it's true. It used to be that women didn't fuck every guy to buy them a drink, but that's the way it is now (or close to it). I've taken home over 20 women in the last six years for one-nighters, as well as having four close long-term relationships. Back in the old days, women held out for a long time to make sure the guy was sincere. That doesn't happen now. If they've screwed around with a lot of guys, it just means no guy is special to them.

Remember to have fun, but don't commit unless you are absolutely certain she really is a good girl. Have fun, move on.

Dating Someone With Children, NO!!!

As my readers know, I was married for a great number of years, and had a very traditional marriage. I have a daughter from that marriage who is very intelligent and mild mannered. We get along as well as two grown adults. She is very perceptive and intelligent and I never have to call her out on any behavior.

When I've dated women with children of a similar age, the children are always horribly behaved. They are very nearly depraved. They tell lies, they make false accusations against men they don't want their mothers dating, and the end result is always destructive. I've had discussions with such women, but have only slipped up and started sleeping with one just once. Once was all I needed. When the daughter was introduced to me, the father suddenly flipped out and went to the police to issue an amber alert. The police came to my house and interviewed me. Nothing happened, of course, but I learned the hard way that dating a woman with a child is dangerous.

My daughter asked what all the fuss was about. I explained to her that lots of people cannot manage their own lives, and so police and social workers are often called in to sort out the mess. I haven't seen that woman again, and she was upset that I broke things off, but sometimes people have to face the reality that their children probably need to be given up - if they are so badly behaved that everyone's life goes "on hold" until they grow up and go away.

Do not date anyone with a child, unless the child lives with the father most of the time. Wait, that's not even a safe plan - just don't date anyone with children unless they are grown up and have moved on.

Where Are All the Nice Guys?

Here is a quick overview to let you know what women really want.

1. For sex or a short-term relationship, women want a player. They want a guy who is confident, flatters them, or gets drunk with them. Nice guys can score with women all the time. Just keep dating and keep moving until they give in. It's just a numbers game as far as sex. To increase your chances, be confident, get into conversations and relax around women.

2. For relationships and marriage, women want a jerk. They want someone to order them around and be firm with them. Sex isn't so important. Women want a guy who knows he is in charge and that she is subordinate. Never believe the lies that women want a nice, egalitarian relationship. It doesn't work. I've been in relationships that always had tension or didn't work out because I'm easygoing and it's not important for me to always be in charge. Most women need this. They need a man who shouts and slams doors, rarely does chores and insists on always being in charge, especially when he is wrong about something.

3. If you are a "nice guy", you will have to find a woman who is just as easy-going as you are. If you find a traditional woman, she won't respect you in a relationship. They always want the arrogant and aggressive guys in marriage. That means lots of nice guys can simply use women for short-term relationships then move on.

I know it's a little strange when our educational system tries to pound the masculinity out of boys, drugging them with Ritalin and putting them in behavioral classes. Don't take the wrong lesson from life. Women want any guy with a smile and a drink in their hand for sex. For marriage or a relationship, he has to be a traditional dominating man, or the marriage won't last - or worse, it will be sexless, joyless and empty.

So much better to stay single I'd say.

Dating Disasters

Most of us who have been "out there" know that a lot of women are not really fit to be in a relationship. For many reasons, they are good candidates to pump and dump - if you know what I mean. Of course, that can be a good thing. I like dating the high-powered career chick types because they always seem to let their ego get in the way of being happy. This means we have a great time having sex and they get to fall in love again, then I leave when they try to take control or push me around.

Here are some of my wonderful dating disasters with high-powered career chicks:

• I agreed to meet a good-looking English girl on a date as long as it wasn't too crowded. I showed up at the place and it was a tourist trap, a huge coffee shop with easily 300 people inside and out. I never found her. Later, she complained that I didn't look long enough.
• I dated a woman for a month who was great in bed and we really had fun, but her ex-boyfriend called about four times a day and she couldn't stop talking about him. That became tiresome quickly.
• Another one had been dumped by a friend-with-benefits. He got married and moved away. I dated her for three weeks, but she was still hung up on him and talked about him every single day.
• I dated a Jewish girl who never watched television, never caught the news, just watched old DVD movies over and over. Her entire life was spent talking about her wonderful life as the ex-wife of a guy who ran a pawn shop. That didn't last.

The wonderful thing about these girls is that they have such a big ego, they do the work for you. If they are so important, and you are so small and insignificant, then these are the ones where it is appropriate to break up by email, text, or letter. You don't have to do all that drama of breaking up in person after two weeks of hot sex.

Chicks with Dogs

The great thing about the dating scene is the complete sexual liberation of women. It's easier than ever to score. What I've noticed is that you have to be part of the "scene". If you are different, or too out of the mainstream, then they are too cautious.

If you are listening to all the right popular music (or pretending to), are keeping up with the cool movies, etc., and you keep in shape, you are 99% of the way there. Of course, there is a shortcut.

Get a dog.

I have a golden retriever and they are great dogs. You'll want a dog because single women who sleep around almost ALWAYS have dogs. They think of them as protection and companionship. In the old days, they would have had a man for that, and loved their children. Now, they just sleep around, and they have this big dumb animal to look after. It's perfect.

I've found that women with dogs are the ones who buy into the Sex & The City lifestyle the most. Women with cats are more realistic about human nature and seem to know when you are just there for sex. Women with dogs think of men as animals, humping and then off to do whatever they do - which works for a lot of women. I've know countless women who basically waited around for years for their long-term boyfriends to come over, fuck them, then disappear. They loved the relationship and couldn't ask for more.

Now you might think I'm going too far with this, but most of the women I've met have had boyfriends that weren't monogamous. In other words, they weren't loyal, but tried to fuck as many women as possible even while in a committed relationship - just like dogs running around the neighborhood.

Don't think women like nice guys or loyal guys. They save those guys for late in life when they are completely emotionally exhausted by all the games. Most of the time, they just want to get poked by a guy who only wants one thing before he moves on. Be that guy, and you'll have it made, dawg.

eHarmony and Match.com

Just for your information:

Match.com is for players and slutty girls. This can be a good thing. The Jewish girls I've met have been real psycho hose beasts - and I've met them all on Match.com. Match is like a high-quality version of Craiglist. If people have to pay, they are going to be a little higher quality than the herpes herds you'll find on a free site.

eHarmony I really have some good things to recommend. The women on that site area bit higher quality, but still looking for romance. The real difference with eHarmony is that the women are more often than not going into the service with the idea of getting married. Some are successful, but most are content to just have sex with players and move on until they find someone they are ready to settle with.

I have to say that its best to wait until one of these services offers you a sale price/discount, it comes along now and then and it's a much better value.

Recommended Reading

The Modern Savage.

This guy is very funny and very informative. I don't believe 100% of what he says, but it's good to read stuff from someone who is simply himself without being so PC about dating and sex and other topics.

Great read.

Sabine the German Teacher

This happened immediately after my divorce when I was trying to hook up as often as possible. I met a German teacher through Craigslist and we went out about six times before anything happened. She was just a lot of fun to be with, so I didn't press the sex issue.

So, after a couple bottles of Chardonnay and some music, we are in swimsuits at my place by the pool. We start making out and before we even get in the water, she wants to go inside. She gave me the worst blow job of my life; teeth, scraping, horrible. I finally just got up, pushed her down on the bed and fucked her missionary position until I got off. I remember she had these wonderful grapefruit sized tits and her body smelled wonderful. Her eyes were very pale light blue, it wsa like being with an oversized barbie doll.

To this day, I still have a very faint scar on my dick from that day. No girl I've ever dated has had such awful teeth. I think I saw her a few times after that day, but it wasn't anything I wanted to repeat in bed. It hurts even to think about that day.

Last Summer

Ok, this was a bad one... I met this woman named Jennifer online. She was a manufacturer's rep, had one kid and was ready to start dating again. We had a good conversation, but I could tell when we met for coffee that it was not going well. I told her about my marriage and how it ended and that seemed alright to her. Then she told me she had been married but it was like no chemistry at all. It was as though she had married her brother. Not good.

Next she told me how she met a complete neanderthal. You know, the type women complain about, but are lining up to have sex with. This guy was a complete jerk, fat, ugly, farting all the time. He would go to work with egg on his chin and sleep in his eyes. He cheated on her over and over again, but she still loved him. Finally, he just got bored and moved out.

She told me I was the best looking guy she'd ever been on a date with, but that didn't matter. She didn't feel I was the right type, and there was no chemistry.

I was glad she came to that conclusion. I wasn't interested at all. When a woman has EVER had any attraction at all to a neanderthal type, it means she doesn't want you, and she's really been with lots of guys. I've had several women employees just start shaking with lust when our janitor comes around, even though he looks like he's half-gorilla.

Sometimes I really don't understand women. This would be one of those times.

Thursday Evening Comic

The "Meet at My Hotel Room" Thing

I did go out with a girl who had been at the same Microsoft symposium with me in Los Angeles. She was total granola - meaning she was very much an environmentalist type, no makeup, ruddy complexion, but really a funny girl. We had a very good time laughing it up and having fun at the convention, but when we got back to the bar, I realized I had no attraction to her at all. She got me to come up to her room and we had the TV on and started making out. So, while I'm kissing her and running my hands up and down her body, I'm very strongly imagining one of the hot girls from Caliente on spanish TV.

I'm really making out now and starting to get into the mood, and she asks, "why are your eyes closed?"

"I guess I just automatically close my eyes, it's just all a physical thing to me." I said, and we got back into it. We had been drinking which helped a lot. Finally I got my boxers off and got on top of her pushing her sundress all the way up. I rubbed the tip of my dick against her wetness, and she was very wet. When I pushed into her, she gasped and really got into it. It was really good sex and my first impulse was wrong. She rolled me over soon and got on top, humping away and massaging her tits, playing with her nipples as I lay back and enjoyed the ride.

It was a very sweet afternoon. She admitted later that she was married and showed me a photo of a small pudgy guy with a bald head and what looked like no self-esteem. I felt bad about it for a while, but then again, she didn't tell me she was married and I didn't ask.

Lady Bodybuilder

When I was living in Los Angeles directly after my divorce, I started dating almost immediately. I wasn't as selective as I should have been, and there were many drunken nights with many drunken sluts. I think I helped Trojan cut a bigger profit that year.

One of the "maybe I shouldn't do this" girls was a bodybuilder named Lisa. She had sent me a photo of herself in full workout mode and I wasn't attracted, but had never even spoken to bodybuilder chick before, so we did go out to lunch. We went to this high priced place in Santa Monica and she was wearing a little outfit with her tummy showing. Now I thought I was fit, but she was iron woman. It was a little weird, but as she talked about how she worked out different parts of her body, I started to get interested. As we walked out, I asked to see her again, and we made plans to go out again, but for dinner this time.

The very next night, I met her at her apartment in Woodland Hills on Topanga Canyon. At the door, she was wearing another one of those small outfits. We were both happy to see each other and I gave her a hug. I pulled back a little and said "can I have a kiss?" and we started kissing. I was turned on but the muscles were a little strange. She had great tits as most of these muscle women have implants. I ran my fingers over her tummy and brushed against her bellybutton which was as hard as a rock.

We paused to have a drink and then got right into the bedroom, putting our wine glasses down on the dresser. It's weird, but a really fit girl seems to have a lot more of her private parts on the outside. It's like more of the labia pokes straight out. Still, it was all good on the inside. It was too strange for me in the end. We fucked and fucked for about 40 minutes. I finally got off (without a condom, bad, bad, bad), but I didn't want to repeat the performance.

About a day later I called her and told her I couldn't see her again as I was unexpectedly taking a job in San Jose. That ended it, but at least I know what it's like to have sex with a she-monster.